Only in Florida: No Need to Check the Room

August 25, 2016
JACK-BLACKBUSH

You Can Tell a Lot About a Hotel From What's in the Lobby

In my column Only in Florida, I'll be taking you down to the Sunshine State for the latest and greatest sex stories that can only be found in the craziest state in the union.

When visiting a hotel, you can pretty much judge how everything is going to be by the lobby. If the lobby has nothing more than a couple of old chairs and a half empty water cooler, the rooms are probably not going to be that nice. On the other hand if the lobby is filled nice chairs, televisions, and a pretty sweet continental breakfast, odds are your stay is going to be wonderful. But what if you lobby has a nude woman in it?

Local deputies arrived at a Vero Beach Knights Inn responding to a call of a “suspicious person” who also happened to be completely nude and found Bobbi Fatz (which sounds like a famous blues artists) without any clothes in the lobby.

At the hotel, a deputy spoke with Bobbi Fatz, 29, who said she was staying with a friend in room 203. She said she had an anxiety attack and that all was OK.

Having never suffered from anxiety, I have no idea if when having an attack it’s good to strip off all your clothes and sit in a hotel lobby or not. I’ve heard of breathing exercises, but I don’t know if you have to be naked and in public for them to work.

Fatz also wanted the deputies to know that everything was OK in her room.

Fatz said there were no issues in the room and also no reason to go there to check on Moises Casanas. Hotel staff reported Casanas, 33, rented the room. A deputy saw Casanas walking back and forth on the second floor balcony. He said “everything was fine and even asked if I wanted to check the room.”

I don’t know if it was the fact that Fatz was nude or the face Casanas kept coming out on the balcony to say everything was OK or not, but deputies ended up checking the room anyway. Much to their surprise, the room was OK - but they also found some crack and a crack pipe. Of course, Fatz and Casanas denied it was theirs, but it turns out it was. Both Fatz and Casanas were arrested on possession of cocaine and possession of drug paraphernalia.

So, remember this: also check the lobby of the hotel. You may not want the free breakfast, but you probably don’t want a nude woman in your lobby either.