This Just In: Jessica Simpson Has Fantastic Cleavage!

It's Not Really Breaking News, But It Is Pretty Awesome Cleavage

We have some breaking news: Jessica Simpson has fantastic cleavage! Wait a minute, this isn’t breaking news! We all know Jessica Simpson has fantastic cleavage. But hey, if the idea of breaking news got your attention long enough to catch a glimpse of Jessica Simpson’s awesome bikini selfie, then it was worth it.  

Oh, who am I kidding? It really doesn’t matter whether I call it breaking news, breaking bad, or breaking wind; it’s all about the incredible image of Jessica Simpson in a red and white striped bikini will draw you in better than any words I can think of. Normally that would be a bad thing for someone in my profession, but I think I’m OK with it. I mean, I get to look at the pictures too. It’s not like they hide the pictures until I’m done writing. Hell, there are a couple of times in which I should be writing and I’m spending a little more time than I want to admit staring at the pictures. In my defense, Jessica Simpson does have some of the best cleavage on the planet. It would be rude if I didn’t stare longer.  

It’s not breaking news that Jessica Simpson has fantastic cleavage, but it’s still something you should know about. As if you didn’t know already.  

Via Jessica Simpson on Instagram