Wet Spots

· Madonna appears as a sexy horsewoman/riding crop fetishist in a whopping 58 page photo spread in the new issue of "W" shot by Steven Klein. There's been some buzz about her posing topless in some of the photos, but the pics in question are actually shot from the back. It's, uh, quite a back though. (justjared.com)

· Can you tell the difference between a hot blonde actress and a hot blonde drag queen? Not to worry; Charlie Sheen may or may not be able to either. (rjr10036.typepad.com + nydailynews.com)

· The suddenly-hot-as-a-pistol magicka-fortified dwarven longsword videogame "Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion" has had its content rating changed from "Teen" to "Mature" thanks to hackers who created their own modifications that allow nudity, thus demonstrating once again the first law of computer software these days: If you build it, they will add their own boobies. (vnunet.com + blogs.usatoday.com)

· Speaking of boobies, Lindsay Lohan wants hers back. Everyone, now: Don't we all? (egotastic.com)

· A Kentucky high school science teacher was suspended from her job after school authorities claim that the fact that she had appeared in a porn video a decade ago "would cause a disruption to the educational process". We think if anything it would've made her students pay more attention in class; besides, at least she wasn't sleeping with them, right? (wave3.com, via Sploid)

· Adrants scores an advance copy of Kate Moss' sexy new Nikon spot, scheduled to premiere in movie theatres nationwide this weekend; we advise watching the YouTube version and saving yourself the trouble of having to sit through "Mission Impossible 3". (adrants.com + YouTube)

· Dirty Headline of the Day: "Sexy 'Russian Ballet' lifts off at Wang". Snicker if you want (we did) but the article goes on to describe "bare-chested, chiseled men and glamorous, strong women turning, leaping and swooning over each other with reckless abandon." See, a little culture can be good for you! (bostonherald.com)

· Of photographer Kelly O's new "100 Balls" exhibition in Seattle, The Stranger proclaims that "balls are the new tits". Let's see: they're both round, usually come in pairs, and tend to be exposed in situations involving excessive alcohol consumption, so maybe they're onto something after all. (gridskipper.com + thestranger.com)

· Speaking of jangly bits, keeping the hair on your "boys" clean and manageable may be a part of life, but it can also be a pain in the you know what. Well, Philips wants to change all that, and their spokesdude is maybe just a little too in love with the idea. (shaveeverywhere.com + ifilm.com)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives