Wet Spots

· Hazing! Lap Dances! Bondage! Women's soccer! Yes, the latest college athletic "scandal" certainly sounds intriguing, but now that we've seen the photos of Northwestern's women's soccer team and their initiation ritual, we have to admit we're a little disappointed; if we want to see gals rolling around in sports bras, we'll stick to beach volleyball. (badjocks.com)

· A 94-year old man in Taiwan says the secret to his longevity is his collection of over 100,000 photos of beautiful women that he looks at every day—which proves that reading Fleshbot really can make you immortal. (chinadaily.com.cn)

· What started as an April Fool's joke could turn into a legitimate Guinness World Record as an Irish bookmaker is trying to organize the world's largest strip poker game. One suggestion to neophyte card players: when the short stack says he's going all in with his ace high, make sure he's talking about cards. (news.yahoo.com)

· Mattel is launching a new lineup of Barbie dolls featuring Pin-Up Girls of the 1950s aimed at grown-up collectors. We're saving our allowance for a Bettie Page version with Whip-Crack Action™. (nbc10.com + barbiecollector.com)

· One more reason while file sharing is evil: downloading classical music via a P2P program can lead you down the slippery slope to child pornography. No, really! (montereyherald.com)

· Meanwhile, if you ever get busted surfing porn at work, make sure to tell your boss that it was an accident. After all, 94% of your fellow smut fans can't be wrong. (informationweek.com)

· You can also use a similar excuse if you're ever caught spying on two women in a public restroom: just tell the police you were trying to prevent them from having lesbian sex! (Whether or not they'll believe you, however, is another story.) (mlive.com - thanks Chris)

· Durex's "He Says, You Say" ad campaign aims to provide snappy comebacks for the excuses guys give for not wearing condoms, while internet sex shop LoveHoney is also giving away freebies (to UK residents, that is) to promote the program. We find "put it on and you get to have sex" to be a pretty persuasive tactic. (hesaysyousay.co.uk + lovehoney.co.uk)

· Finally, always remember: Ceiling Cat is watching. You've been warned. (ceilingcat.com, via Defamer)

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Previously: Morning Wood Archives/Wet Spots Archives