DVD Review: “Couples Seduce Teens 3”

A couple looking to "spice up a fizzling marriage". A friend with a camera. The Internet. Arizona. What could possibly go wrong?

Plenty, as it turns out. Read our review of "Couples Seduce Teens 3" after the gap. - Gram Ponante

***

Studio: Pink Visual
Director: Rico Montana
Cast: Misty, Emma, Jeanie, Shasta

Review by: - Gram Ponante

Before popping in this disc I was worried that the "couples" in question would not be real, or that they would be not much older than teens themselves. Turns out I needn't have worried. From scene one it was apparent that the couple on the prowl for an Internet teen (she a sculpted, deep-voiced woman and he a wise-crackin' good old boy with love handles) were both married and twice the age of their prey.

The word "seduce" is really overused in adult content, because everything is planned out. If seduction happens, it's by accident; the money has been agreed on and, more important, the cast has seen everyone's HIV test.

But as the first couple made its way to an Arizona mall, friend with camera in the back seat of the car, it appeared more and more that this was actually happening. At that point I got a little scared. These people were going to pick up a girl that the wife had met over the Internet. The girl, Shasta, did not know the husband was coming and certainly didn't know there'd be a camera there.

We watch the tense negotiation before the young woman gets in the car. It's not just the lack of a smoke machine and porn heels that makes this look real.

And it continues to look real, with most sticking points explained away (continued presence of a camera), until the fucking happens. The husband goes from his wife to the young woman, back and forth, without a condom. I relaxed. It waasn't real, but it looked real enough. These people were professionals (although the wife really needed to go to a different tanning salon).

(And of course the guy pulled out to come on her waiting face.)

(And the young woman's name was Shasta.)

The remaining three scenes didn't spend so much time on exposition, and featured a pornier-looking couple. Where did Couple One go? It is as if they had been kicked off Swinger Island.

In the remaining scenes, the feeling of watching something potentially awkward and sexy transpire in real time gave way to the realization that the cast should hurry up and stop pretending they'd just seduced each other. When I seduced you, did I leave on all the lights in the motel room? No I didn't. Because I care about you, baby.

Natural-breasted Misty from scene three was my favorite, but if my wife and I decide to go seduce a teen, we're gonna stay away from Arizona.

· Pink Visual (pinkvisual.com)

Previously: Porn Valley Dispatch Archive