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Japanese Septuagenarian Arrested For Dumping 500 Pounds Of Porn In A Park

EDITORIAL FEATURES

When they're not busy appearing in porn, Japanese septuagenarians are apparently busy dumping large quantities of it in a park in Japan. According to Japan Times (link below), that is precisely what happened on Monday night, when police apprehended a 70-year old man who was dumping up to a quarter-ton of porn.

Hideaki Adachi was spotted unloading 17 sacks of films and magazines, which included around 500 VHS video tapes, from the back of a truck at a small park in the city. Adachi, 70, was arrested on suspicion of illegally dumping the material, which weighed some 200 kilograms. 

So why was he dumping this porn, you ask? Think of the most obvious excuse you can. Go ahead, just think of the most hackneyed, overused, no one in their right mind will believe you excuse. Got it? Alright, I'm gonna hazard a guess that you came up with the old, "it belongs to my buddy" excuse, right? 

...he was released the next day after telling police he had found the trove in a storehouse belonging to a bedridden friend, police said in an interview.

“He wanted to get rid of them out of goodwill for his friend,” a spokesman said.

So how did Adachi come to think of this park as a good place to dump his friend's giant porn stash? He works there...

Adachi, who worked as a volunteer in the park helping homeless people, allegedly told police he had hoped the huge collection of pornography would be picked up and taken to a proper disposal site.

So he figured that if he just left it in the park, either somebody would take it to an actual dump or maybe all of those homeless people could just, you know, add it to their collections. This guy is my new favorite person ever. 

Via Japan Times