Power, Pizza, And Pussy Eating: The Ultimate Relationship

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Veronica Adkinson might seem a bit cold and callous in "Creep Van," but when we look at her, we see our dream girl. Who else shares our love of BDSM and wants to mix pussy eating with pizza ordering (and coupon utilizing)? What other woman can make a ratty old couch come alive with her stiff corset and a firm backhand?

Friends, it's never a good idea to develop feeling for girls in horror films, especially if they're sexually active and/or mean to the main character. In fact, you can tell that Veronica doesn't last all that long just by watching the trailer; that van gets her and she doesn't even have to leave the couch. Remember: you can protect yourself from evil vehicles, but you can't protect yourself from heartbreak.

· "Creep Van" (imdb.com)