The Encyclopedia Of Smut: N Is For Narratophilia

What do you do with your mouth during sex? We're not asking you where you put it or how you move it, we're asking about the words you use. Do you like talking during sex? What about when you're not having sex--have you ever been turned on by a special phrase uttered by a special person? You don't have to answer these questions; we just wanted to get your mental juices flowing for today's encyclopedia entry about sexual language.

Since this is a huge topic, we're going to focus primarily on how pornography handles dirty talk. If you're looking for articles on how you spice up your bedroom vocabulary, we apologize. We think sexual communication is far too important and personal for us to guide you through, but you can always consult Cosmo or AskMen! Anyway, onto the smutty talkies.

Positive Reinforcement

When people criticize porn for being "fake," one of the most common areas of discussion is how the actors express themselves verbally. After all, porn is performance, and there are times when they have to exclaim about how good something feels, how big or tight certain body parts are, and announce and/or exaggerate their orgasms. There are definitely ways to communicate these things visually, but they're not as reliable as words and sounds.

Anyway, we like it when pornstars make noises, and there are many ways they communicate with each other--and with the viewers--in positive tones. Here are some broad categories we've noticed:

· Instruction: Everybody needs to communicate with their sexual partners before, during, and after the act, even professionals going through a choreographed regimen of positions. You hear these all the time; you probably use them too! "Fuck my ass," "touch me there," "get the condom," and other requests and imperative statements are not only helpful for making sex physically successful, they also reveal the innermost desires of the speaker, and that adds intimacy.

· Prophecy: We're talking about future tense stuff. Pornstars (and non-professional sexually active people, too) like to describe what they're going to do to each other. Why? Because anticipation can drive you crazy with lust.

· Encouragement: Anything positive said for the benefit of another. This includes everything from "Yes!" to whimpers and moans that let another person know that they're doing the right thing.

· Personal: This is essentially the same as above, except it's not about praising someone else as much as it is about announcing one's own joys. It's like Walt Whitman's "Song of Myself," "I celebrate myself, and sing myself," except perhaps slightly more direct when it comes to the announcement of an impending orgasm.

[Above: James Deen whispers in Jenna Haze's ear, and Jenna moans encouragement back, via "Real Female Orgasms 9"]

Negativity and Naughtiness

We have some reservations about using the binary system of positive and negative here--perhaps we should've made the distinction between sweet and spicy language instead--but we want to point out that a great deal of what's said in porn can be hurtful out of context even though it's also used to enhance pleasure. Some people say that power dynamics are present in all sexual relationships; whether you agree with that or not, there are definitely some verbal ways to establish or highlight eroticized inequality between partners. (And as long as it's consensual, it's totally cool by us!)

For example, in most dominant-submissive relationships, the dom will say things to belittle the sub. These can be criticisms of appearance or sexual prowess, name calling, or setting up specific ways to address each other (such as Madam or pet). Instruction definitely comes into play as well, but when backed by authority, it's not just about asking for specific pleasure, but also about exerting control.

And let's not forget how language can be used to humiliate! Take the clip of cuckold porn above for example: the wife expresses how well-endowed and competent her new lover is in order to put down her hubby's sexual stylings.

Oddly, you never hear people talking about how this sort of talk is fake. It's one thing if a pornstar exclaims how good someone's tongue feels, but it's quite another thing--perhaps even offensive or socially harmful to some people--if a pornstar calls their partner a whore.

[Above: a young woman taunts her husband during a cuckolding session, via "Cum Eating Cuckolds 18"]

Dirty Talk at a Distance

We haven't used the term narratophilia since we put it in the title, and we figured that we owe it to you--and the beautiful word itself--to break it down a little more. Narratophiles are people who find pleasure or physical arousal in words, and that definitely goes beyond sexy things said in person. It can also include:

· Phone sex: When you can't touch or see the person you're talking to, their words, voice, and even the sound of their breathing become endowed with erotic energy. Even if you're talking to a lover on vacation and you're going to fuck them silly the following week, you're on the phone, and you can't express a single urge with silence. So not only is it fun to hear what the other person has to say, it's also exhilarating to give voice to the fantasy in your own head.

· Writing: Honestly, who talks on the phone anymore? We've got computers, so if we want to say something dirty, we can do it with an email or instant messaging. And let's not forget sexting! If brevity is the soul of wit, then short messages typed by your thumbs are little cherry bombs of arousal. Plus, you don't need to be alone to send and receive sexts; you can do it in the middle of an important office meeting (but don't, our economy is already hurting).

· Reading: Narratophilia also involves arousal by means of consuming erotic literature. (Frankly, we feel like narratophiles every time we go to post one of those True Sex Stories.) This might seem like a silly point to make, but it's important to note that those who love words don't need to be the subject or object of words in order to find pleasure in them.

And on that note, we're going to go spend some quality time with Walt Whitman.

[Above: Nyomi Banxxx is not afraid to demand an asshole cleaning because "Mommy Knows Best 5." All videos courtesy of AEBN Porn Pay Per View Network and Adult Video On Demand (theater.aebn.net)]

[At top: words literally get this girl off, via ePantyhose Land (galleries.ferronetwork.com)]