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Kelly Shibari Keeps “Roseanne XXX” Afloat

HARDCORE

The novelty of featuring the game Kelly Shibari (the BBW who isn't April Flores) and Tim von Swine as the beefy midwestern Connor couple quickly loses its luster in this uninspired parody that should have tried harder.

Roseanne: The XXX Parody

Studio: Dream Zone Enertainment
Director: Jim Enrght
Starring: Kelly Shibari, Tim von Swine, Violet Monroe, Jules Sterling, Vin Vercose, Kayla Paige, Kris Slater, Dylan Ryder, Johnny Castle, Jack Lawrence

Review by: Gram Ponante

The Connor family gathers for Thanksgiving and, Cinemax-style, employs a generic soundtrack and uses phone calls and flashbacks to set up sex scenes that could have taken place in any movie, but for the lovely Violet Monroe's plaid shirt.

For some reason the gang is gathered in a room outfitted like a mead hall, underlining a production that didn't try too hard. When Jack Lawrence steps in for a scene (set up via phone) in a jail, we sense that he was hired simply because he already owned a cop uniform.

There is also a laugh track which, if we think about it in the same terms as the axes and medieval trappings on the wall of this working class home, might also have been an ironic choice.

But then we come to the inevitable workout between Shibari and von Swine, and this makes "Roseanne: The XXX Parody" worthwhile. All of the sex scenes are good, but theirs is both good and different. There's no mention of fetish or BBW or empowerment here; it's just a scene with two married-looking people having sex like pornstars - we wonder how Tony Comstock snuck in.

As a parody trying to compete in a crowded market, "Roseanne" is lit well, edited passably, acted with competence (with extra effort by Shibari, von Swine, and Monroe), but dull and unfunny.

Still, I'd rather watch it than "This Ain't Gimme A Break XXX."

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Kelly Shibari Keeps "Roseanne XXX" AfloatKelly Shibari
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Kelly Shibari Keeps "Roseanne XXX" AfloatKelly Shibari and Tim von Swine
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Kelly Shibari Keeps "Roseanne XXX" AfloatKelly Shibari and Tim von Swine
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Kelly Shibari Keeps "Roseanne XXX" AfloatViolet Monroe and Kris Slater
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Kelly Shibari Keeps "Roseanne XXX" AfloatJules Sterling
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Kelly Shibari Keeps "Roseanne XXX" AfloatKayla Paige
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