Punk Rock To Fuck By

I don't think that any of the corporate porn parodies has of yet produced a single good song - especially the ones featuring pop stars or glee clubs. That is why "America's Best Porn Music Videos" is so fun.

It is no surprise that, decades after "bow chicka wow wow" faded from porn soundtracks, the music in porn is so bad that even the barely legal get the joke.

A compilation of musical interludes from Jim Powers movies, mostly featuring neo-Ramones tunes and California punk songs from the movies "Schoolgirl Slut," "Little Runaways," and "Fuck Truck," "America's Best Porn Music Videos" is an exception.

Powers, who in another life played in the punk band Kiljoy, directs these videos with real joy and the full and zesty participation of the likes of Sasha Knox, Emma Heart, Ashley Blue, and Cindy Crawford.

And some of the songs are really good.

For example, Powers collaborator/minion Johnny Thrust does his best Joey Ramone in "Fuck You in the Ass" and "Daddy Says." Not only are they catchy songs (imagine Joey Ramone singing "Hanging out with your slutty friends/Tweaking out and sucking cock"), but they are also funny, if low-tech, videos.

Compare this to the bland studio magic of the "Glee XXX" soundtrack or the "Britney Rears" movies and you'll see that the music matters to Powers.

I'll also mention the work of Dave Naz, whose "Circa 82" and "Turbo Rock" also had some great music. Naz is also a former punk rocker. What is it about heavy, three-note bass riffs that goes so well with Ashley Blue getting pounded in the ass?

Among the other standouts on "Porn Music Videos" are two songs featuring a writhing Cindy Crawford. One stars black performer Devlin Weed playing a dirty slide guitar in "Black Snake Boned" and the other is a takeoff on "O Brother Where Art Thou" in which Crawford does an a capella version of the traditional "Down to the River" wearing a pair of cutoffs.

Then there's Chelsie Rae doing "Tinkle Time" to the tune of the Go Gos' "Vacation" and Sasha Knox singing "Schoolgirl Slut (In My Butt"), ala the Bee Gees' "Stayin' Alive" whilst dancing in front of Disney Concert Hall. That's above and beyond porno dedication.

This is a great compilation movie with some inspired performances. Sadly, the picture quality is reminiscent of early MTV, probably because editing to sync the lyrics couldn't be done that easily. Still, next time Johnny Thrust, Sasha Knox, or Emma Heart is performing, I'm going.

· Jim Powers (mrfilth.com)
· Buy "America's Best Porn Music Videos" (gamelink.com)