Stand So Close To Me: How To Engage In Teacher-Student Role Playing

After watching "Worship My Schoolgirl Ass," we felt pretty envious of those pornstars who got to embody the studious sexuality. Then we realized: we can totally do that. And now, so can you!

But it's not as simple as going out, buying a school uniform, and calling your significant other "Professor." Well, it sort of is. But why stop there? With a bit of ingenuity, planning, and a school supply store, you can be the sexually naïve but practically curious porn archetype you've always wanted to be. (Or you can be the overbearing but nurturing authority figure; the choice is yours!)

Dress To Impress: Let's start with your costumes. You can spend as much or as little as you please in this department, depending on how much you'd like to soup up your closet. For example, if you buy a bunch of plain, white dress-shirts, will you be using them for anything besides role playing? Or will you be shredding them off your lover's body on the first day?

For schoolgirls: The basic costume includes a short, pleated (preferably plaid) skirt and a simple dress shirt, blouse, or polo. Go the extra distance with: a headband, a cardigan, knee- or thigh-high socks, Mary Janes or Keds, a blazer, and a cross necklace (to really capture the Catholic roots of the schoolgirl persona). Sailor suits are excellent alternatives to the schoolgirl uniform, and have a distinctly Japanese flavor to them.

For schoolboys: A simple pair of slacks and a dress shirt will do, but they're pretty boring on their own. Spice it up with: a pair of shorts, a blazer, a newsboy cap, some tube socks, and maybe a vest. If you feel silly, just pretend you're Angus Young.

For teachers, professors, administrators of any gender: Men can go for the frazzled academic look: corduroy, tweed, suede, and leather, mixing and matching jackets with elbow patches. (We don't remember which fabric goes with which jacket, sorry!) Women may opt for the icy, intellectual vixen. It's similar to "sexy librarian" or "naughty secretary" in demeanor and hairstyle (up, tight, and clean), but with the distance and superiority only granted by multiple doctorates.

For everybody: Ties are absolutely necessary. Glasses are a nice touch, especially for the authority figures.

Pencils, Books, Dirty Looks: It's nearing the end of September, and school is already in full swing. Now that all the real students have purchased their Back To School supplies, you can find discounted accessories for your academic adventures. Not only will these add vibrant realism to your role playing, but some of them double as sex toys. Rulers are, obviously, great for spanking; tape becomes bondage tape when in a pinch. Heck, you can even give your favorite teacher an apple and then shove it in his/her mouth as a quick gag.

Location, Location, Location: You don't need access to a classroom; there are plenty of other places you can go!

Tutor? I hardly know her: The student sits at the dining room table with a fat stack of books and a frown. The tutor stops by to help, discussions of algebra quickly turn dirty (as they always do), pencils and books go flying, and all of a sudden you're having rough sex on the table.

Thanks for the ride!: The TA was helping grade papers late into the night, so the professor decides to give him/her a ride home. Maybe they end up in a deserted parking lot, or maybe they quietly park in the driveway, but wherever they are, the two share a quiet moment together. They can no longer deny their true feelings for each other, and they crawl to the backseat to fog up the windows.

See me in my office: The principal is very upset with the student's behavior, and warns him/her that any further mischief or poor grades will result in expulsion. To drive the point home, a rough spanking is administered. Sexy antics soon follow. This scenario works best if you have an office in your home, or if you have access to a private office in your workplace after hours.

A Final Word: Though the power dynamic is somewhat embedded in the age/wisdom difference between the student and authority figure, you should feel free to subvert and reverse roles. This might be an obvious point to make, but some people overlook the possibility for a brilliant, MILFy, powerful political science professor to submit to the raw lust of one of her students. After all, young people today do have a lot to teach us about sexuality (or something like that). It doesn't really matter which way power flows in a teacher-student tryst. All you need to do is hike up that skirt, pull down those shorts, and toss those leather patches all over the bedroom.

· Jennifer White pic via Pure 18 (gallys.realitykings.com)