The Tenga Flip Hole Is Tiramisu For Penises

And their latest model, Flip Hole Black, provides more than a style upgrade. The minute you dive inside, you plunge through layer after layer of dark, tight, wet joy. This thing gives you more than a little pick me up.

The idea behind the Flip Hole is simple: it's a male masturbation sleeve that eschews "realism" and focuses on delivering as much intense pleasure as possible. This tall boy of fuckable fun is split down the middle so you can flip it open, lube it up, clean it, dry it, whatever. I personally enjoyed opening it so I could admire the intricate obstacle course of elastomer jelly that Tenga designed.

Some people think the insides look insect-like, others see little cities, and I think parts of it look like the eggs from Ridley Scott's "Alien" series (seriously, there are folding flaps with a scary little spiked ball inside); regardless, all these bizarre and beautiful elements have important jobs to do. Both the Flip Hole and the Flip Hole Black have defensive structures (called the Lip Flap and Shield Flap) that keep lubricant and air pressure neatly sealed inside. The rest of the design is a little hard to explain, but the general idea is that you push past tight things (the Flaps and the Click Orb), through a ridged and rounded tunnel (Side Rib, Quattro Wave, Wing Gate), and plant the head of your cock in a bumpy pit of all around ecstasy (the End Orb). That's how the original model works. You can see it in the picture above, on the left.

The Flip Hole Black is even better. After you push past the Flaps and a few small wavy things, you come up against the Cross Walls. I had no idea that this little plate of dainty tea sandwiches would squeeze the bejesus out of my cock, but it did—feeling somewhat more meaty and powerful than I expected from a mound of jelly—and now I worship the Cross Walls. But there's no downtime after the squeeze; you're immediately drawn into the Orb Shelter and pressed against the firm Core Orb. What's this? Another section? An oversized End Orb!? Keep the lube handy, because your penis just found its new home.

You know, I keep mentioning lube, but I haven't told you that the Flip Hole comes with three different trial bottles of their custom stuff! These test tubes contain different formulae: Mild, a silky substance that makes everything all soft and smooth; Real, your normal moisturizing lubricant that's supposed to feel like, I don't know, vaginal lubricant or something; the last one, Wild, is a viscous syrup that clings a little, enhancing the sensations of every little facet of the sleeve and I love it dearly.

I've been checking what other critics have said about the Tenga Flip Hole, and the most common complaint is that—unlike the Fleshlight, which has a screw valve on the back that allows you to control the vacuum inside—the Flip Hole lacks any significant suction. Dear other critics: you're doing it wrong. Every Flip Hole has the One Hand Control Pad on the outside with three pressure points that you can squeeze to shift sensations. The bottom point makes it tighter at the entrance, squeezing the top point increases pressure and stimulus on the head (where that delicious End Orb lies), and grasping the middle turns the whole damn Tenga into a wet, slurping Black Hole. Boom, one-handed vacuum modulation. Take that, Fleshlight.

Yes, now that Tenga is in my life, I don't think I can go back to Fleshlight. Even when they don't model their openings off of pornstar anuses and alien vaginas, the Fleshlight is a clunky, goofy thing to stick your dick in. Simply put, the Flip Hole is a smarter toy. Here's a list of benefits:

1. It keeps lube inside the toy, not on your balls.
2. Cleaning is a cinch, and you can leave the Flip Hole to dry on the same plastic sheath that holds it closed during use.
3. The material doesn't pill or flake like Fleshlight cyberskin.
4. The End Orb!
5. Its sleek design is pleasing to the eye. Honestly, I've had female roommates walk in on me cleaning toys before. They caught me cleaning the Fleshlight and said, "Ew, what is that thing?" They caught me cleaning the Flip Hole and we had a discussion about Japanese design and Tenga's new molding technology that allows for double-layered details like the Alien egg looking thing.

The only thing that worries me about the Flip Hole is a little comment in the instructional booklet that says "Correct care and use of FLIP HOLE will let you enjoy it 50 or more times." Only fifty times? Oh well. The best things in life are fleeting.

· Buy the Tenga Flip Hole (babeland.com)
· Tenga (e.tenga.co.jp)