Porn Valley Dispatch: Your Meat Is Pink

It is only just that porn movies be titled like porn movies and not some bare-and-half-assed attempt at duping consumers into believing they're "sexy thrillers" or maybe even "a story about a pirate looking for a lost sceptre". That's why the studio Lethal Hardcore is keeping it real ... real trashy. More after the gap. - G. Ponante

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"Big Black Beef Stretches Little Pink Meat 4" is what it is and does what it says. And the series has been quietly laboring in obscurity through what one can only imagine is three pinkmeat-stretching episodes.

Lethal Hardcore is the studio behind "Phat Buttz Drain My Nutz"" one of my favorite movie titles of Ought-5, full of frankness and promise, and even "Pink Meat"'s font hints at, with its bitten-into Bs, a certain carnivorous violence that is a far cry from tame and ambiguous titles like "Euphoria" or "Hidden Secrets". What the fuck does "Hidden Secrets" mean? (Not only that, it is a tautology.)

"Big Black Beef Stretches Little Pink Meat 4" stars someone named Breezy (pictured, with hand enpanted), someone named Bailey Bliss, someone named Chelsie Rae, someone named Estelle, and someone named Joey.

What's next for the LC crew? "Cream on My Cameltoe"!

We salute Lethal Hardcore for its bold titles, even if we can't bring ourselves to watch them.

· Lethal Hardcore (stoneycutisxxx.com)

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Previously: The Seed of a Man's Heart is Stoney Curtis, Porn Valley Dispatch Archive