Pistol Panties

When I was growing up in Mexico, women on the beach never wore bikinis until they were over 40 and "comfortable in their skin". The girls my age would never rock a two-piece in public, so I was forced to stare at their mothers. The point is that times have changed and now some lady designer has started a hip bikini line that all the celebrities are wearing—that is if you consider Sarah Jessica Parker a celebrity, which I don't because her show made my balls retract and turned my penis into a vagina, and although that may excite some of you, it kinda fucked up my game.-J. Martinez

Pistol Panties (Flash w/sound @ pistolpanties.com, via Goldenfiddle [not my real son])

Previously: Zoozoom: Summer Is Black, Bikini Contest Galleries, Micro Kitten Bikini Models, Bikini Brawl, ALS Bikinis, SI Swimsuit 2005