So. Jessica Lowndes is apparently now an Instagram model, though I'm not entirely sure what that job entails. Does she still act? Did Instagram have to approve her for this? Where did she buy that lingerie, and can I afford it? After much introspection, I've gathered together the things I need to do to achieve Jessica Lowndes Rules the Instaverse Status:
- More squats, probably.
- Amass more than 400 Instagram followers.
- Get sparkly tattoos on my ass.
- Learn how to do backbend on a rolly thing without killing myself.
- Learn how to do a backbend at all.
I might just be SOL.
I mean, she can't be a real person.
Can she?