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“My Girlfriend’s Mother 5”: Epic Waves Of Infidelity, Bro!

HARDCORE

[youtube XKF8XAQuEEU 628 353]First and foremost, you have to watch the trailer for this film. Tyler Nixon and Xander Corvus play surfers and they put on the Cali-valley bro act to a crazy degree. Things are epic. People are bros. When Tyler discovers his girlfriend cheating on him, his primary complaint is that she made him miss killer waves.

Also, backwards caps!

Anyway, you know the drill with this sort of scenario. Teal Conrad is dating the surf-obsessed Tyler Nixon, and she thinks it's time to bring him home to mom for the holidays, so off they go to meet Jewels Jade--who just happens to be a former surfer! While Tyler is in the other room, Jewels mentions that she's broken up with her boyfriend, James Deen. Teal notes that Tyler is a great guy, but that he gets too obsessed with surfing and doesn't think about her enough. The soil is rich and the fuck flowers will grow.

So Teal runs into James and the two of them talk about their love lives and all the confusion in their hearts and dear oh dear how very lonely they are! One thing leads to another and they fuck. The pictures definitely make it seem like Teal enjoys James more than Tyler. James gives her a jaw-dropping orgasm (if not multiple), but with her boyfriend, she can only muster up a face that vaguely looks like sexual enjoyment.

When Jewels and Tyler catch the other two in such an intimate situation, they're naturally pissed off, but more importantly, they are free to fuck each other. We appreciate two things in this arrangement. First, it's a nice change of pace to have the titular hook-up not be the first sin in the film. Second, we like that Jewels is not exactly chomping at the bit to fuck Tyler. She doesn't believe it when he kisses her, she passively lets him bite on her lip, but sure enough, she gets into the fun of screwing this goofy young man and putting his surf-built core strength to good use.

Meanwhile and elsewhere, Xander Corvus is having sex with Adrianna Luna. Why? We're not sure, but we love that Xander calls Tyler just to bum him out about the good surf weather he missed. The waves are calling you, Tyler! You never would've slept with your girlfriend's mother had you only stayed true to your calling! "My Girlfriend's Mother 5" makes us ponder our own destinies, too.

· Sweet Sinner (sweetsinner.com)
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