The Hottest New Plague To Hit Our Shores: “MILF Mania”

Why hasn't the CDC responded to the massive outbreak of "MILF Mania" in America? Is it even a disease? Some people think it's bacterial, some say it's a virus, and some people think it's a product of the United States finally having a gorgeous First Lady, but the streets are on fire and all of our authority figures are hiding in their homes watching reruns of "Cougar Town."

We guess there's nothing left to do but wait for "MILF Mania" to take us, too. It's a good thing fatalism gets us so hot and bothered.

And if we must be consumed by the craze, we ask that Taylor Wane be the cougar who delivers our death blows. She takes such pride in her MILFy curviness that she's enhanced both her breasts and her lips, yet her arms and legs are lean and muscular; Taylor could easily take all of us in a fight, and that's something we look for in a sex partner. She also has a uniquely manic enthusiasm when she's getting fucked just right, and Erik Everhard's fat cock sends her to a place of pure, wide-eyed ecstasy. Her eye shadow smears, her lipstick rubs off on Erik's dick, and her red locks end up in a frizzy, almost childish side ponytail; Taylor looks gorgeous.

It's always a pleasure to see Veronica Avluv out and about! It feels like we usually see her playing the classy older lady who seduces cute, impressionable twenty-somethings in Mile High Media films, and now she's playing the classy older lady who gets ravaged by Manuel Ferrara. Guess what? She's still rocking pearls on her neck and her wrist. We're sure that Veronica and Manuel take turns being the aggressor in this scene, but we love the idea of Ms. Avluv having her way with Manuel; when she sucks his dick, she holds it with both hands, like she's giving her acceptance speech. We don't know what the award is, but yeah, Veronica totally wins.

Oh yes, Lisa Ann is in this movie, too. She's obviously the source of this "MILF Mania" outbreak. Do we really need to describe the way her mouth wraps around the head of Erik Everhard's cock? No, we don't. Lisa Ann is the reason why MILF is spelled with caps lock.

Maybe the world will live on after this wave of "MILF Mania" has passed, but frankly, a world without MILFs isn't a world we want to be a part of.

· Jules Jordan (julesjordan.com)
· Buy "MILF Mania" (store.fleshbot.com)