Um, Zoe Voss And Gracie Glam Are Not Like “My First Girlfriend” At All

My thoughts fly back to that rainy October day when my first girlfriend, T- L-berg, threw up at her Bat Mitzvah but we made out anyway. "Will Zoe and Gracie capture that romance in their lesbo romp?" I wondered.

Doe-eyed and leggy sylph Zoe Voss sits across the couch from built-for-business Gracie Glam as slow bassy jamz play. We imagine a soulful mixed race guy in a cocked hat noodling with his acoustic just off camera.

Gracie does all the talking.

"I know you must be nervous," she says with a frankly porny vocal fry. "But I want you to kiss me."

Then the two of them slurp at each other's faces with loud adult entertainment industry smackings.

"This is not like the Bat Mitzvah at Mt. Stubing Country Club at all," I thought. "Thank Jesus."

· Third Degree (thirddegreefilms.com)
· Buy "My First Girlfriend" (gamelink.com)