We Pity The Fool Who Doesn’t Love “The A-Team XXX: A Parody”

When we learned Bree Olson was starring in David Lord's parody of the A-Team we were happy, but not surprised. When we learned the "A" in "A-Team" stood for anal, however, we practically burst out of our pants!

Back in the 80's a group of renegade commandos wrongfully accused of a crime they didn't commit went AWOL, then solved crimes using disguises, dynamite, and lots of one liner's. Frank Lupo and Stephen J. Cannell's band of Samaritan miscreants-for-hire roared to life on the small screen, captivating audiences with colorful characters fearlessly spouting off to villains and bringing justice to the oppressed.

Car chases, flipped vehicles, airplanes, explosions, shoot outs, fist fights, and all manner of mayhem were jammed in between ridiculous plot lines acted out by the most polarized cast of characters imaginable. They specialized in the impossible, saved the day in style, all while avoiding the authorities but driving the same black van with the sloping red stripe—and we loved them for it.

This summer, hot on the heels of a theatrical release that, like it or not, brought the show back to the forefront of the entertainment starved masses collective memory, David Lord and Adam & Eve have brought a tribute to the beloved original show.

Bree Olson stars as Amy the journalist, who's bent on saving her hapless ex-husband and fellow reporter Seth Gamble from the ridiculous plot he's become embroiled in, involving bikers, gang members, a Mexican drug cartel, the Chief of Police, and a prominent and very corrupt City Councilman expertly played by fellow porn director Roy Karch. It's all part of the campy fun, with each character being spoofed along with the show itself in a playful but accurate homage.

Bree starts out by giving Seth's salty nuts and stiff shaft a tongue bath, then lets the kid pound her pretty pink taco for a while. After she's good and worked up she takes some backdoor action, her eyes rolling back in her head as she screams in ecstasy. Once this little sex kitten is fully charged up there's no telling how crazy she will go, or how many orgasms she'll need to feel fully satisfied.

When Gamble goes missing, those who know him best chalk it up to a pussy and alcohol binge. Bree steps up the search by contacting Howling Mad Morecock, played by the nurse-fucking Scott Lyons, who puts her in touch with Cannibal, the leader of the A-Team, played by Randy Spears. Is there anything this guy can't play? Spears delivers an award worthy performance through several unbelievable costume changes, ridiculous lines, and the general aping of an icon seared deeply into our hearts and memories. When the time comes for him to receive his reward from Bree for saving the day he delivers with astounding success, making us guess at his real age and sign up for a gym. Anyone who can satisfy horny little Bree Olson deserves applause, but the way Spears nails her is befitting of nothing short of a standing ovation. You'll have to see her climbing the walls and begging for more to truly understand.

Evan Stone gets cast as Ace, the con man who can get anything with his good looks, lies, and pure charm. In David's retelling we learn that not a single one of those qualities actually work in Stone's favor. In the end it's sheer dumb luck and persistence that give the impression he's such a smooth operator. In fact when strippers McKenzie Lee and Sophie Dee decide to tag team him they beg him to stop lying, even though he's been dead honest, and to not talk during sex, so he doesn't ruin the experience for them. Stone turns the tables quite nicely, treating each randy slut to a proper pounding. The pacing is great, the sex escalates, the heat in the scene climbs like wildfire, and soon he is punishing their dirt pipes with a blistering back door assault that has them screaming like banshees.

True to the story, some chase scenes in the famous van happen, guys on bikes, jumps, stunts, and mayhem. There are some fight scenes, a lot of very funny dialogue punched in between, then more fight scenes, gun play, explosions, and stunts. It's crammed all the way full, no pun intended.

Rising star Tyler Knight (famous for spoofing Tiger Woods during his sex scandal) takes the coveted role of the mohawk sporting mad man BA, standing naturally for Bare Ass. With the gold chains and the feather earring and the hair style, he looks pretty close. We don't know how Mr T feels about it but it's better than a trip to McDonald's in our opinion—we're loving it. Knight takes a swing at Luscious Lopez's sweet, juicy ass, and knocks it out of the park.

"The A-Team XXX: A Parody" releases soon from David Lord and Adam & Eve. For more of the sexy super action check the gallery below. We know you will love them! Just like Peppard grinning with that cigar bitten into his pearly whites, we love it when a plan comes together.

· Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
· Adam & Eve (adameve.com)

Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Bree Olsen and Seth Gamble
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Bree Olsen and Seth Gamble
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Bree Olsen and Seth Gamble
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Bree Olsen and Seth Gamble
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Bree Olsen and Seth Gamble
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Bree Olsen and Seth Gamble
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Bree Olsen and Seth Gamble
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Chastity Lynn and Scott Lyons
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Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Chastity Lynn and Scott Lyons
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Chastity Lynn and Scott Lyons
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Chastity Lynn and Scott Lyons
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Chastity Lynn and Scott Lyons
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Chastity Lynn and Scott Lyons
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Chastity Lynn and Scott Lyons
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Luscious Lopez and Tyler Knight
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Luscious Lopez and Tyler Knight
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Luscious Lopez and Tyler Knight
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Luscious Lopez and Tyler Knight
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
Luscious Lopez and Tyler Knight
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)
McKenzie Lee, Sophie Dee, and Evan Stone
Buy "The A-Team XXX: A Parody" (tlavideo.com)
Adam & Eve (adameve.com)