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Don’t You Forget About “The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody”

HARDCORE

It's a familiar story about a jock, a geek, a princess, a rebel, and a sociopath, with a few twists. Oh, and sexy red daydream Faye Reagan plays Molly Ringwald. Won't you at least come see about her?

John Hughes would lose his mind if he saw Faye Reagan playing Molly Ringwald in his classic teen angst drama. Lucky for him, he's passed on--but the unforgettable legacy that shaped many of our childhoods lives on.Molly Ringwald, of course, is still with us, but she might just join the late great director when she see's this. Either that or fuck herself raw while watching it. What? It's hot. You know how we feel about Faye. Shit, for all we know we caught our debilitating case of redophilia from Molly in the first place.

It all goes down on Saturday, in detention, at college? Yep. It's porn, people. They can't likely be high school students that all happen to be over 18 years old and in detention.

Instead of the epic performance of Paul Gleason as Principal Richard 'Dick' Vernon, we we get treated to hottie MILF Samantha Ryan playing the college dean, who's got a serious sweet tooth for bad boys. She manages to get the Judd Nelson character, played expertly by rising male talent Chad Alva, into her office and then her silky mouth and vagina. Sounds like a banner detention session if you ask us. Smoke 'em up, Johnny!

The affable loser with the violent and anti-authoritarian instincts also nails the hell out of Faye, naturally, who goes from princess to school slut with convincing enough acting to snatch a recurring role in almost any UPN series--perhaps even the George Lopez show.

Then there's the jock, played by Levi Cash, who claims he got detention for banging three cheerleaders at the same time. Sounds like he took a page out of Charlie's book. The cheerleaders in question, Brooke Van Burren, Tessa Taylor, and Breanne Benson, really were egging him on for a steaming hot fuck session in the locker room. Not sure why that makes it detention worthy but it sure is fun to watch. Beats seeing Emilio duct tape that hairy guy to a bench.

Levi's follow up is to nail the sociopath loner Ally Sheedy clone. Only this time around the character is played by drop dead beautiful seductress Andy San Dimas, which makes it way more viable than Hughes's original premise.

Oh, and we finally get a peek at that girl from Niagara Falls that Anthony Michael Hall claimed he was banging before he copped to being a virgin. Through the magic of the flashback, and maybe a little psychic energy passed back from the Dead Zone, our classic cool geek, Sonny Hicks, shows us his romantic rendezvous with a chesty blonde Canadian paramour Siren Sexton.

"The Breakfast Club - A XXX Parody" comes out next week from New Sensations. Check out our sample gallery of the action. Who the hell made that statue? It's fucking dead on!

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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasBuy "The Breakfast Club - A XXX Parody" (tlavideo.com)
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasLevi Cash and Andy San Dimas
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasLevi Cash and Andy San Dimas
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasLevi Cash and Andy San Dimas
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasLevi Cash and Andy San Dimas
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasLevi Cash and Andy San Dimas
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasLevi Cash and Andy San Dimas
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasBrooke Van Burren, Tessa Taylor, Breanne Benson, and Levi Cash
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasBrooke Van Burren, Tessa Taylor, Breanne Benson, and Levi Cash
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasBrooke Van Burren, Tessa Taylor, Breanne Benson, and Levi Cash
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasBrooke Van Burren, Tessa Taylor, Breanne Benson, and Levi Cash
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasFaye Reagan and Chad Alva
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasFaye Reagan and Chad Alva
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasFaye Reagan and Chad Alva
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasSiren Sexton and Sonny Hicks
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasSiren Sexton and Sonny Hicks
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasSamantha Ryan and Chad Alva
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasSamantha Ryan and Chad Alva
Buy "The Breakfast Club - A XXX Parody" (tlavideo.com)
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasSamantha Ryan and Chad Alva
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Don't You Forget About "The Breakfast Club — A XXX Parody" / andy san dimasFaye Reagan
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