Not The Verne Troyer Sex Tape

Given the fact that we were all treated to the sight of him pissing into houseplants on that VH1 reality show a few years ago, we guess this had to happen eventually: Famous tiny person Verne Troyer, best known to audience until this point as Mini-Me from the Austin Powers movies, has gone and made himself his very own sex tape. (Yes kids, even dwarves make bad decisions sometimes.) SugarDVD has reportedly offered $100,000 for the tape--but unless they get Troyer's consent, none of us will get to see just how else Verne likes to get freaky. While you're (not) waiting to see how it all pans out, we invite you to watch this alternate reality version of how things might look. We know it's not the real thing, but it's the closest we could find for now ... and maybe the closest you'll ever want to get.

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· Midget Cock Is Too Small (megarotic.com)
· SugarDVD Makes Offer for 'Mini Me' Sex Tape (avn.com)
· Mini-Me Sex Tape: Avert Your Eyes! (tmz.com, via Defamer)