Porn Valley Dispatch: The Least-Dressed Award

You know how when you pass through TSA security and the ridges on your brain smooth out, causing you to lose what mental acuity you once possessed? That is what is preventing me from doing the necessary research to find out exactly why so little skin was shown at this year's adult hoo-ha in Vegas. But of all the people who signed at booths for hours and hours, showing only what convention fatcats allowed them to show, only Missy Monroe offered a snapshot of a not-nude-but-naked halcyon past. More after the gap.- G. Ponante

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"I've just kind of been flopping around here," Monroe said at the combo JM/Chatsworth Pictures booth (around which Ashley Blue also flounced) while wearing only pasties and underpants. (I have yet to see Monroe in stripper Lucite heels, although it is mandatory to own them within 10 square miles of Van Nuys).

Apparently, an edict from the Puritan fathers of Las Vegas decreed that pasties must be worn at all times at the Expo and that flesh must be kept from Gram. It made people like Belladonna look buttoned down.

Maverick altporn producer Malachi Ecks concurred: "Kylee Kross jumped on me and her ass came out a bit," he said. "And security told her she couldn't do that. It was only a little crack."

But Monroe did all she could to remind people that the convention was all about sins of the flesh rather than Digital Rights Management and convergence and whatnot. For this, America thanks her.

"You're welcome," she said. "Do you want me on the counter?"

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See also: Gram's AVN 2006 Unprofessional Photos (gramponante.com)

Previously: Postcards from Las Vegas: Day One, Postcards from Las Vegas: Days Two to Infinity, More AEE 2006 Photos, Porn Valley Dispatch Archive