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Only in Florida: Getting The Talk

EDITORIAL FEATURES

He Was Only Trying To Be Helpful

In my column Only in Florida, I'll be taking you down to the Sunshine State for the latest and greatest sex stories that can only be found in the craziest state in the union.

Each and every one of us has a fond memory of getting "the talk". You know the one all about the birds trying to have sex with the bees. Whether it was from a sweaty parent who for some reason got a stutter all of a sudden or from a trained medical professional who used a bunch of words you never heard of before we've all learned about sex in one strange or awkward way. For one brave Florida Man he wanted to save every parent the trouble of giving the talk by telling a bunch kids on a playground where babies come from.

Yes, Otis Dawayne Ryan decided to visit his local playground, climb on top of one of the many piece of equipment, my guess would be one of the slides; you know something high up so everyone could see and hear him, and as the police report states:

"He then started shouting from the top telling the children that babies come out of women" — and used a vulgar term in doing so.

And for some crazy reason, parents raced to get their children away from Mr. Ryan, which seems kind of odd sense he was doing everyone this great favor. Wouldn't you know it, Mr. Ryan was soon arrested for his public statements. You know, maybe Mr. Ryan should work on his delivery, maybe that was the issue.

"The Talk" while very important can also be very stressful. It's not every day a man like Mr. Ryan comes along to take that pressure away from you.

via Tampa Bay Times


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